Posted: March 27, 2013 in Uncategorized

Inside every woman, no matter her age, is a little girl – still innocent and longing to see a better day as the sun rises every morning.

Common Sense and Sensibility

I know I’ve already written on Les Miserables, but it’s just such an amazing book that I simply MUST write another article about it, especially since the movie is coming out this Christmas. I read this passage in the book, and it touched my heart and gave me a fresh perspective.

For those of you who aren’t familiar with the novel, I’ll give you some background. Picture the scene: a dimly lit hospital room, heavy with the presence of deathly illness. A frail, emaciated form languishes in fever on the bed, its former beauty ravished beyond recognition. This is Fantine, the prostitute. But it wasn’t always this way. Once, her lively, sincere smile brightened the hearts of all whom she graced with it, and frequently so. She loved a man, once, with everything she could offer him; sincerely, innocently, and wholly. But he left her, dropped her as a plaything…

View original post 880 more words


Posted: March 26, 2013 in Uncategorized

I still shudder when I try to imagine what could have been MY fate all those years ago. Luckily for me, he showed his true colors before there was a wedding, and even for a blind sheep that I was back then, there was no denying that married life with him would be a fate worse than death…probably on par with spending an eternity in Hell itself!

Christian Pundit

Forget About Being ‘Equally Yoked’ – Article: ‘My Abusive ‘Christian’ Marriage’

When it comes to dating or marriage, Christian men are not necessarily a better catch than Non-Christians, as I’ve mentioned before in previous posts (such as (Link): this one).

A lot of Christian wives are physically or emotionally abused by their regular-church-attending Christian husbands.

Some are murdered by their preacher husbands.

If you run an internet search for the phrase “preacher murdered wife,” you will receive hundreds of news stories of, well, preachers who killed their wives.

Here is but one example of many that turned up on a search engine:

(Link): Preacher [Anthony Hopkins] killed wife, stuffed body in freezer, police say –

You are just as better off marrying a Non-Christian guy as a Christian one.

I find most Non Christians easier to talk to – they are usually less judgemental. They are usually less…

View original post 1,193 more words

Posted: March 13, 2013 in Uncategorized

The truth will set you free indeed!


Posted: March 5, 2013 in Uncategorized


Beauty for Ashes

Posted: October 25, 2010 in Uncategorized

Just when I thought I was finally safe and sound, mother called me yesterday morning, and I endured the most miserable hour-long phone conversation I care to remember. Ah, nothing like an unexpected, nasty surprise to ruin a perfectly good Sunday morning!

Of course, nobody gave a damn or understood when I stoically endured all manners of physical discomforts related to physically acclimatizing to a new environment all those years ago when I first came here as a traumatized teenager on the verge of suicide and just needed to get away from the toxic, hellish environment everyone else was calling home-sweet-home. I can still remember – crystal clearly- how everyone waited with glee to watch me fall flat on my face and go running home back to Sparks because I couldn’t handle med school. I honestly don’t know where the determination to succeed came from. I made a vow to myself and all that was sacred (of which there were not many!) in my life that I was going to either graduate or die trying. If not for the grace of God and everyone along the road that helped me, I never would have made it.

I still wonder why I’m not surprised mother NOW wishes that I had given up on my goal all those years ago and went running back home. I guess she still views me as the obvious candidate for the sacrificial lamb to be slaughtered on the altar of the needs of this family. If I had been loved, nurtured, respected and protected, I would actually feel guilty for having a life that is my own. Well, ain’t that a surprise: the village idiot everyone laughed at, taunted, ridiculed, and ritually humiliated just for kicks turns out to be the one person who actually gets any shit done for this family instead of just flapping her gums at everything. Years of being used as a verbal punching bag by a demented, psychotic bitch for her dysphoric, bipolar screamfests richly spiced with every profanity and abuse one can imagine taught me the true meaning of “silence is golden”.

If I had any previous doubts that no good deed ever goes unpunished, they were decidedly banished by what happened the day mother decided to come to Tainan unannounced. I became so irritated by her intrusive questions I could hear my voice raising in an angry crescendo before telling her bluntly that I just don’t want to talk about it. Period. God, if she was smart, she’d know when to just leave it at that and not push me any further!

On a beautiful, serene, sunny post-hurricane Sunday morning, I was aptly reminded of the awesome grace of God~before, I was right there in the gutters: trampled, despised, and worthless…yet after, I possess enough dignity to know for a fact that my Master is my ultimate keeper-and that nothing has escaped Him.

As the dreaded weekend looms closer and closer by the minute, so does my anxiety grows. It should have been one of joy and celebration, but I am overwhelmed by worry that things will turn ugly~REALLY ugly because there are people in this world who just don’t give a flying rat’s ass about others, the circumstances, who they embarass/humiliate, or what the consequences are. Anything and everything is expendable when it comes to opening up their yapper and spewing out shit.


Posted: September 8, 2010 in Uncategorized

God said, “My Grace is sufficient.”

I managed to not miss this morning’s Epi live talk and was glad I attended. This is an extraordinarily slow day on the job, giving me the spare time to study. Just when I thought nobody gives a damn about me, it turned out that maybe it was I who needed to open up more to others and try to be more receptive.

If God punishes those who mistreat me, wouldn’t it have been better if He planned it in a way that they didn’t mistreat me, I didn’t (and don’t) have to live such a miserable life, and my tormentors wouldn’t have to incur the Wrath of the Most High? Why go through all the trouble? It just all seem so pointless…

If I had a choice, I’d rather be a blissful, ignorant fool than a tormented, miserable genius. But I guess that’s really not up to me to decide.

Diamonds and Rust

Posted: September 7, 2010 in Uncategorized

This has been a day of a monumental, crushing disappointment~of not getting something I yearn for but don’t deserve anyway…AND being treated like an outcast for no longer wanting to play the fall guy.

The precious little morsels of goodness still in my life are the things I’ve worked hard to get and to keep…and maybe it’s THOSE things I should be eternally thankful for.